Not bad for a first attempt, here are some suggestions: the intro with just the pad should only be 4-16 bars. Other elements like percussion or an instrument(s) would be a nice addition in keeping the energy and keeping it interesting. The vocals are good, i always put reverb on my vocals, you can experiment with that. The growls are good and very deathstep like, but the emptiness in the space after the snare doesnt really work. Also add background elements like a choir and pad and synths to keep the drop fresh. Good first attenpt all around, im glad i can inspire you so much!